Top Ten Reasons Why John McCain Suspended his Campaign
Rudolf Ogoo Okonkwo
Friday, September 26, 2008
In the
light of the economic crises facing the United States, Republican Presidential
Candidate, John Sydney McCain, suspended his presidential campaign on Wednesday
to return to Washington and work on the bailout plan for financial institutions
in America.
That was the official position of John McCain’s campaign. Here now are the real reasons why John McCain suspended his campaign.
10: His first wife, Carol McCain, angry at media revelation of another ex-model old flame of John McCain called a world press conference in Virginia Beach, Virginia to warn ex-beauty queen, Sarah Palin, to beware of her models/beauty queen-loving former husband.
9: Sarah Palin has a prearranged moose-hunting contest coming up this weekend in Alaska. It is sponsored by Shell and she does not mess with Shell or else she will forfeit her tanning bed.
8: Two-day suspension will save John McCain’s campaign $3600 needed for John McCain’s own share of the $700 billion every American needs for economic bailout.
7. His wife, Cindy McCain, is once again taking pain killing pills from anyone in a dark alley after she lost millions in the collapsed Lehman Brothers.
6: His Arizona tailor has not finished McCain’s debate suit due to changes in his positions.
5: Hilary Clinton advised him to suspend his campaign to confuse the skinny one.
4: The handwritten text of his debate opening statement was lost in one of the McCain's thirteen cars. They need more time to find it.
3: The promised October Surprise has not been delivered as planned by Georgian president.
2: It is his only way of admitting that he cannot think of two things at the same time.
1: He needs a ploy to return to Washington and consult with his high school buddy, Abraham Lincoln.